Minimum Wage Rant

I was having a conversation in a pub the other night about minimum wage - unfortunately it was with one of those people who still blame Thatcher for everything (most recently, his glasses prescription had gone up - "thank you Mrs bloody Thatcher" - Labour have been in power for what? - 8 years now, and Thatcher was gone for 6 before that!).

Anyway, the problem with trying to have a sensible debate about finance with a socialist is that... Well they all seem to believe that if we all earned a million pounds a day, we'd all be fantastically rich; they honestly cannot see that the economy does-not and can-not work that way.

So, basically, my arguments against Minimum wage would have been pearls before swine, so I just changed subject and saved them for my blog, so here they are:

Pre minimum wage, some poor bastard is earning 3.50 an hour washing pots at a restaurant, The chefs are earning about 4 quid, the second chef is on 6, and the head chef is on 8. Likewise, out front the waiters are on 3.50, The Wine Waiter and receptionist are on 5 and the Head waiter is on 7. The guy who owns/manages the restaurant, who's invested his time and (more importantly) entire financial wellbeing in the place, gets what's left; as he runs his business well, he manages to draw about 9 quid an hour.

The potwasher, waiters and lower-end chefs all feel a bit hard done by, as they can't afford to eat at the restaurant they work at.

"this is shit" they complain "I don't want to work for 3.50 an hour, but I'm unskilled and frankly, not that bright: I can't get a better job - I wish the government would force my boss to pay me more: then I'd be better off"

Then minimum wage came in.

The Potwasher and waiters are now on a fiver. The chefs notice this, and have something to say:

"We trained for years to do this job; we have skills and run around busting our asses in the hottest part of the kitchen. If the potwasher gets 5 quid an hour, we want 7"

The owner is a fair man, and sees their point: in all honesty a shaved ape could operate the dishwasher, and it isn't fair to give trained personnel the same money as a shaved ape, so he gives them the rise.

The second chef then points out that he brings years of experience to the job, and that he's in charge when the head chef is away: his experience and responsibility must surly be worth something, and if the Chefs are on 7 quid, he wants 9 - fair enough.

The head chef designs the menus, manages stock, and has ultimate responsibility if something goes wrong in the kitchen, so he now wants 12 quid an our (only fair looking at other peoples wages) so he gets it.

Same thing out front; with the waiters on 5, the wine waiter and Receptionist are on 7, the head waiter is on 9.

Everyone is richer and everyone is happy, right?

Except the socialist magic money tree doesn't exist; that extra wage has to come from somewhere....

The prices of the meals have to go up.

The lower end staff STILL can't afford to eat there.

And of course this isn't just happening at the restaurant; it's happening everywhere, so everything gets more expensive and no-one is (proportionately) any better off.

but our story isn't over yet; it gets worse.

Remember the guy who owns the place? Well, he's put up prices as much as he can without driving out customers, and cut every corner he can cut without letting standards drop, but these new wage bills have reduced profit. He can now only draw about 6 quid an hour.

At some point, he's going to look around and wake up:

"FUCK THIS! - I'm running around like an idiot, doing tones of paperwork, arguing with bank managers, risking everything I own and stressing myself into an early grave, FOR SIX QUID AN HOUR - the pot-washer makes 5!"

So he decides to call it a day: he'd be better off closing the restaurant and washing pots for someone else!

So that's what he does: he closes the restaurant.

20 people out of a job, and claiming benefits.

Bet they wish they got 3.50 an hour now...